Things haven’t been working out lately. I’m getting so tired putting in all this effort. I only have so much in me before I have to stop. This stress is killing me.
i had to go to a friends funeral today. unfortunately due to the weather we were really late and only just made the last little bit of it. I’m still really happy i was able to make it out and at least say goodbye. stuff like this sucks so much and its just so unfair to know someone was taken at a young age. i hate how life works out sometimes..
Tonight I had a random woman ask me if I was pregnant. I was mortified to say the least mainly because I’ve been having an internal struggle with my weight and how I look so it really offended me. I would of loved to tell her off but had to respect the fact that I was at my boyfriends work so it’s bugging me even more that I just had to take what she said.
Tonight was actually probably one of the worst nights of my life.
Guess that was the motivation for extreme dieting I needed.
I hate waking up and thinking of him right away and saying something to him. Then I have to sit around for an hour while he ignores me to play on FB and Instagram.
I don’t want to deal with anyone today. I finally come home because I need a break from the city and I’ve had nothing good happen at all.
Constantly being bombarded to do every chore that involves cleaning since I obviously made the mess, being gone 3 weeks and all. Stated I wanted to shower and everyone races to it right before me so when I finally get to I have zero hot water, and it’s super awesome that barb likes to keep the furnace at 64 so I don’t even have anything to warm me up after that. I also went to use my 35 dollar shampoo I only got to use once before I left to find that it is near empty but everyone swears they didn’t use it.
I just don’t understand why I come home and I still can’t catch a fucking break.
I’m just done with people. I’m better off keeping to myself anyways.
I seriously fucking hate being in uncomfortable situations. I can’t stand when people put me in them, so I’m going to avoid this and disappear again since its what I do best.
Everyone else was right. These people I call my friends, aren’t that at all. They never have time for me, rarely invite me to things, fuck off when I need them most and yet they expect me to constantly be there for them and get mad at me whenever I actually can’t be.
Well I think its high time I get that out of my life because I really don’t need the stress it causes me to feel like I’ve done something wrong when in reality its not my fault that they are like that. So fuck them. Sorry guys.